Autumn 1979

“Hold on”

I said

Focusing.

“Stay still”.

I had my younger brother 

Tied up against a makeshift target

Made from

Stolen plywood

And 2x4’s.

And leftover paint

Appropriated from somewhere...

I smoked way too much pot then

To remember where

I found the red paint.

I threw the first knife.

“JESUS!”

My brother yelled.

“You just missed me!”

“That’s what we want!  There’s at least an inch there!”

I retorted.

“Stop being such a pussy!”

I threw the next knife

And the next.

“Thwip! Thwip!”

I somehow missed him.

When it was 4:30

We would stop practicing

And go inside

To watch Godzilla movies

Or film noir

On WABC-TV

Channel 7

Out of New York.

It wasn’t until 

The next spring

That I really got him.

With a baseball bat.

It wasn’t planned.

It was done without thinking.

I had him standing 

Behind me 

Playing catcher

While I hit outfield shots

Up the hill of our backyard.

I caught him 

On the backswing

Right to the forehead

And the blood

Immediately

Began 

To flow...