Gas Station

This gas station 

Has the cheapest gas 

In town.

But there is a prick

There

That I run into

Quite often

And he’s always disciplining me.

He always waits

Until I pay

And THEN reprimands me

Like a child.

He points to the signs on the pumps

Like I’ve EVER gotten out of the car

And taken the time 

To read those.

The first time it was because I left my engine running.

Which is AGAINST THE LAW

Which I knew

But most places

Don’t give a shit.

The next it was because I had my radio playing

With the engine off

Because at this point

I knew that he didn’t like 

The engine on

While he was pumping gas.

It is the cheapest place in town.

Tonight

He just railed me.

Again

While he’s handing me my receipt

That I can’t be using my cell phone

While he’s pumping gas.

My engine and radio were off.

I said

“WHAT?”

He pointed to the sign

On the pump

And to be honest

I don’t even know what it said.

I looked at him

Straight in the eye

And said

“You’re a prick.  I can buy gas a gazillion other places around here.  Why are you busting

  my balls?”

He didn’t know what to say.

I took my receipt

Started up my engine

Turned up the radio real loud

Lit a cigarette

Making sure he could see it

And pulled outta there

Knowing I was never 

Gonna get gas 

Cheaper anywhere else.