The Gnome

I lougied on a gnome’s face tonight
In my backyard.

I wasn’t even looking
And spat right on him.

It was totally disrespectful.

I don’t know what I would’ve done
If he wasn’t concrete
If he was a real gnome.

He might’ve been able to kick my ass
With his superpowers
Or magick
Or something.

He might’ve given me his gnome middle finger.

But he was made of stone
And there was no altercation
Whatsoever.

And so the night went on peacefully.